Boundaries are the limits we set; not only for ourselves but for others. They outline what behaviours we will and will not tolerate and provide a template for what is acceptable and what is not. With healthy boundaries, we can easily identify “our line” and be aware of when this line is crossed. We can then choose how to respond.
Setting healthy boundaries is an important skill to learn, because boundaries protect our emotional, physical, and psychological wellbeing.
If you can relate to any of the following, you may be struggling with your boundaries.
- Do you say yes, even when you want to say no?
- Do you later feel resentful for doing whatever you said yes to?
- Do you feel taken advantage of?
- Struggle to find time for yourself?
- Do you find yourself feeling burnt out?
- Feel guilty if you say no?
- Feel guilty for taking time for yourself?
- Do you feel responsible for other people’s feelings?
- Do you instantly put your own needs and wants at the bottom of the list?
With help, you can change these patterns and feel confident to:
- Assert yourself
- Take back control of your own life and what you say yes to
- Say no and stick to it
- Look after yourself for once
Working on your boundaries will help strengthen your inner self so that you can tolerate the discomfort of saying no. It will also enable you to put your time and energy into the people, work, and activities that you truly want to.